Tuesday 3 May 2016

Cambridge Election Survey - UKIP

Yes, I know what you're thinking, he's going to have a go at Burkinshaw again. I didn't want to, but only two 'kippers have responded to the Camcycle survey. And he's one of them.

A brief note on the election prospects of UKIP in Cambridge: They haven't got any. They will, as ever, crash and burn. They've as much chance of winning a council seat as Leicester City have of winning the Premiership.

So lets meander down to Cherry Hinton, and see what Richard Jeffs has to say. Does he support the Space for Cycling document?
I do not fully support the guide as I feel that there are more pressing issues for local authorities to address and space is already limited, especially in the city centre. Despite investment only being around £20 per head per year in Cambridge, the death-trap "floating" bus stops and overly generous new cycle lanes do not really help in an already congested city. I do agree that cyclists and motor vehicles should only mix at low traffic speeds and volumes.
Well thats shit then. The cycle lanes we have are overly generous, the floating bus stops (just like the ones we've had for decades out in Fen Ditton without, as far as I can tell, any safety problems) are a 'death trap' and stopping people dying is just too expensive. Well whoopee do.

Getting kids to school safely?
I feel that children are safe at the moment. We must ensure that the Green Cross Code is taught, cycling proficiency lessons are laid-on, lollipop ladies are employed at crossings and free school buses are provided to and from the Park & Ride sites.
Because its 1983, of course. I mean actually making cycle provision safe and reducing the problem of parents whizzing to school in Chelsea tractors? Naaah, thats just crazy talk.

Ok then Richard, what about your concerns as a cyclist and the concerns you've got for other people riding?
My concern is that cycling is not inclusive as it requires a certain level of fitness and ability. it could be described as a sport as well as a mode of transport and people should be discouraged from using the public highways as a gym for everyone's safety, especially elderly pedestrians.
Hasa diga eebowai, as I believe the phrase goes. 

Cycling is a facilitator for many with mobility issues, and a tool to prevent too many ending up so unfit they can't get around. But this also misses the point - no one, no one has argued that we must all cycle, merely that making cycling safer and more appealing has environmental, health, congestion, cost, noise and social benefits. Cyclists are threatening to you because you see them as 'other' - and the sooner you stop projecting your own petty insecurities our way the sooner we can all get back to ignoring you.

The remainder of comments basically suggest we should get off and walk and other such crap. 

Now I was going to go through Burkinshaws responses but, bluntly, whats the bloody point? Seriously, we know he hates us. I can't condemn him more than he can himself. As in:

 Or, for that matter:

With thanks to Richard Taylor for filming these.

So, how 'bout that UKIP then? I'm left with the impression of watching a political movement thats like a fart who's too-old to be out partying with kids in a night club, pissed out of its skull in the corner and yelling barely coherent abuse inbetween bouts of trying to hold back waves of nausea, and as you walk past all you can think is 'look at the state of that' A movement made up of people so inconceivably stupid that they think its a good move to diss cyclists, who are half of the population of this city, in a survey specifically intended for circulation to cyclists. A group of people so amazingly set in their ways that they can't and don't even want to imagine a world where respecting people who simply choose to travel a different way is normal.

Are you or have you ever not despised a cyclist? Then don't vote UKIP.


  1. Sorry heartface, I am a cyclist. And I don't think that you have represented me fairly. I am all for cycling and have said that I want motorised traffic off the road in our city.

    1. Oh,and the notion that teaching kids how to safe on the road is outdated and from 1983 is crackers. Give credit where credit is due.

    2. Bizarre and peculiarly late response. I've not misrepresented you, I've quoted you. Your own statements on cycling are damning. You're a cyclist yourself? Well you may own a bike, but you don't give a damn for cyclist safety or convenience.

    3. I really do care and if you'd like a chat over a coffee or pint I'd be happy to listen - UKIP is an interesting organisation but I do think that it has some value within the political sphere. I'd probably learn something from you :)

    4. Yes, you most likely would - but there's a massive disconnect here. I've quoted you, directly I think, yet you think somehow you've been misrepresented. I can't fit that together into a rational position, and your criticism of cycle infrastructure within Cambridge seems to ignore the evidence we've got of such facilities working very well here and elswere.

      In short, from what I've seen so far there is no scope for a successful face to face discussion, your position is so alien to good cycle infrastructure practice that there appears to be no common ground.